The Search for Innocence

so i've been sitting here in my little isolated world thinking A LOT about life. just re-evaluating everything. it's graduation week and i've been to tres graduaciones already lol and i still have two more to attend. it made me think about who i used to be in high school, and then kind of bummed me out lol. i used to be the ish in high school haha not to toot my own horn, but there was not one kid i didn't know who was worth knowing lol. not only that, but there was never a dull moment in my life. it could be a monday night and fersur the crew would find a way to pull a kegger lol. that was just my life, never one dull moment, always surrounded by the cool cats, setting trends. sure i might have been a bit excessive, or as some might say, snobbish, but i was just enjoying life lol. then after high school i move to a new city where i know three people, and i just get thrown out of my zone and i lost my oomph lol. sure i've met amazing people here, but it's not the same. then! i snapped back to reality and thought to myself wtf is wrong with you judon?!?! life isn't about keggers, or walking around in the latest marc by marc jacobs sneakers (which i got for $147 on bluefly ahh i love the discounts xD), or any of that stuff. it made me think what happened to the simpler times? back in the sandbox days where we didn't know the difference between rich, middle-class, and poor. it wasn't about having toys made of the best plastic money could buy, or drinking every other day. sandbox days were much simpler and there were no classes or cliques or any of that stuff. i wish i could take a trip back in time and find that happiness that i was once surrounded by. don't get me wrong life is great right now, but some days i wish things were much simpler. oh well just another episode of "ramblings of a teenage designer" lol

Decisions decisions

so i got an e-mail today from someone who said they heard about me from a friend o_O. the e-mail contained a request, one of which i have no clue how to answer. let's call this kid gabriel. gabriel wrote to me telling me he heard i was a design student a PCC which is true, and that i was working on a t-shirt line (emphasis on the past tense). i told him i was no longer doing t-shirts, and wanted to focus more on my higher end stuff, but he made this request of me. to collaborate with him to design a sick t-shirt to help him get his start. he said he's down to pay for the cost of production and shipping. he just needs help with designing and marketing. i'm kind of iffy about this because as i said before i'm done with t-shirts lol. i also said i wanted to focus on me, but i'm kind of at a crossroads with what to do. i also as hoping my first collab would be with someone who i already have ties with. but it is a good opportunity and i wouldn't have to pay for anything (which i feel bad for so i'll probably go half and half if i decide to do it). hmm it just came at such an awkward time when i said one thing, and if i do this, i might look like a complete hypocrite. hmmm come on sandman bring me a dream lol.

I'm Uber Stoked

haha okay so aside from traveling and making clothes i am extremely excited for the new season of degrassi!!! ali getting a new bf, holly j "taking aim" at sav, i want to know what's wrong with fiona :/, riley and zane zzzzomg!!! haha honestly they make an awesome couple. jennas secret ahh i want to know what it is, is that anya? and why is she labeled as two faced? she's so sweet lol. ahhh i'm geeking out major now. i can't believe claire pulled the lovers and the death card O_o ahhh, and the major major major thing i'm super excited for is the new char/adam character!!! the first character who is a female but feels she's really a man trapped in a womans body. duuuuude i can't wait this season is turning out to be really epic. the only thing i'm bummed about from the promo is that it's missing blue, spinner, peter, and jane :/ they were awesome characters. take conner and the smelly gang, but leave b, s, p, and jane :( lol. anyways the promo vid is below, enjoy :)

Whoa What a Weekend o_O

dude this weekend was insane! back-to-back photoshoots ZOMGGGG lol uber work, but i thought everything looked really amazing. (haha sorry manny, but arguing with you was so much fun d:) after all the planning, finding the right models (big shout out to ellie for stepping in and making it amazing. also ellie and luis, you guys were hands down amazing! you took it to a whole new level), getting the photographer and makeup (alexus and shay!), finding hair stylists (bronson and tiny lol), selecting the right locations, dude it was insane work, but i think it all turned out greeeat! this weekend was a really big eye opener for me though. it was very bittersweet. i loved helping nina with her shoot, and planning manny's shoot, although tough and stressful, was so much fun, but i had an epiphany lol. helping manny out was super awesome, but it made me realize that i forgot myself. i've been so busy helping other people make their dreams come true that i forgot mine in the process. so i've decided that i'm dropping my tshirt line. yup that's right. i am shredding the designs as i speak lol. i realized that after helping manny i don't want to look like a follower or trying to shadow him lol. i have been working on getting them sold out of state, but it's too much work, and now that i pulled all my resources to help out my friends i don't want to look like i'm doing the same as them lol. so that's numero uno on my change list lol. the second is i realized i've neglected my career, so this entire summer will consist of me building my portfolio. making clothes and perfecting every technique i've learned. i'm done showing the world what other people can do; it's time for the world to see what i've got. so look out world, it's all about me now lol :).

Stella turned towards me and crumpled my heart in her hand.
“Do you fall in love often?”

Yes often. With a view, with a book, with a dog, a cat, with numbers, with friends, with complete strangers, with nothing at all. There are children who grow up as I did, with the love clamped down in them, who cannot afterwards love at all. There are others who make fools of themselves, loving widely, indiscreetly, forgetting it is themselves they are trying to love back to a better place.

Introducing "Manuel" lol

So tonight was completely random haha went to get a bite at dairy queen with the one and only chalupa xD, or as he's formally know, "Manuel," or as most of you know him as, "Manny." Tonight was extremely random, but actually pretty chill lol. Boredom struck as usual so i decided to interview this individual. Chalupa is so awesome, and has helped me through a big part of my life, and i honestly don't know where i'd be without him, and i'm sure he doesn't know where he'd be without my awesome ideas lol. love you chalupa! :D expect awesome things from him, and check out his blog, mprra.blogspot.com :D. so we're walking out of Hippie Gypsy when this really groovy chick comes up to us, and she's like "are you guys together? like a couple? because you guys are really in love, I can see it in you two," and we were like ummmm hahaha and she proceeds to tell us that we both have amazing smiles, and people with smiles like ours should be together lol. it was completely random, but she turned out to be really awesome, and her english friend was chill as duck lol he commented on my awesome pokewalker xD. so without further ado enjoy hearing a bit about "manuel." :D